unaccountably happy

I have been unaccountably happy this week. Maybe it's because of the infectious way one of our new summer student employees giggles. Or the drama and beauty of a week of roiling gray clouds and thunderstorms. Or the delighted feeling of aliveness I've been having lately, without any breaks for dizziness or malaise or anxiety. Or it's a joy hangover from last weekend's wedding and the bridal shower we threw for my future sister-in-law. There are FLOWERS everywhere. I certainly wouldn't have blamed me if I had been a big ol grump this week, because it's been a long hard one. S and I and some intrepid volunteers have been spending all of our free hours scrubbing and clearing the basement so we can move in next week. Thick black mildew, I'm not even kidding, and paint and dust and scrubbing, oh, eight years worth of gross boy out of the room and please do not get me started on the bathroom. It's getting better. I'll attack it again tonight. I don't know why I'm still so agreeable in the face of this. Our lovely, breezy apartment, the one I've lived in for a record three years and was the first 'home' for me and S, is a ruttin' mess. I've even taken down all the curtains. Fragile April would not have been able to sleep soundly or relax in an echoey, filthy, box strewn apartment, and if the fact that I'm taking this all in stride and still smiling isn't proof that I'm FINALLY getting my head screwed back on my body properly, I don't know what is. I even had to say goodbye mid-week to the kid at work who had been my nemesis for the past few months. Now who am I supposed to prank/tease/be teased by? Even this, and I'm fine. More than fine. I'm happy and I'm energetic and despite all of the hard work and transition coming up in the next week, I am excited. I can do this.