burnt

I blacked out today on the table with the needle in my vein. It hadn't happened before, so I am digging for a reason, something to blame. Perhaps I can blame it on the ferocious wind, which today was carrying a fire down from the sky. Tonight I could see it from S's back door, a jagged orange gash along the mountain. Instead of driving straight home I followed it, pointing my car toward the red glow in the western sky. I drove for five, ten miles. Enough that I was in a bath of smoke, thick like fog, and the heavy, full moon was had turned orange. I stopped my car and turned around. This is not a place for spectators. I should know this. I should be at home, willing my blood pressure to return to normal. Willing the wind to calm down, tame the embers. It's going to be a long night.